Men are reputed to be stoical individuals who grit their teeth and endure pain. It is regarded as a badge of honour to keep going with life through suffering, showing that you are in control.
In wartime, particularly, soldiers often pride themselves on their strength to keep going through any type of pain.
What if the physical pain you suffer is an outward indication of inward emotional suffering. Your body/mind system is highly developed and will take whatever means it can to alert you to problems that are being ignored or stuffed down. Pain can be a deliberate communication to you by your ‘Emotional System’ that something needs to be dealt with. If you ignore the communication issues can get worse.
Understanding this, hearing the communication and releasing the emotional suffering can be a powerful step towards releasing and clearing pain.
“Pain is a relatively objective, physical phenomenon; suffering is our psychological resistance to what happens. Events may create physical pain, but they do not in themselves create suffering. Resistance creates suffering.” —Dan Millman
Two years ago I suffered an extremely debilitating bout of rheumatoid arthritis after contracting a viral infection in India. This continued for months and was very difficult to deal with.
I found there was no medical solution to the problem, only relief by drugs from the pain. Investigating deeper I realised, through discussions with various therapists, that I was able to connect what was happening to a particularly difficult emotional period after the break-up of my marriage. I came to realise that I was holding on to a lot of emotional pain, which was being converted into extreme physical pain.
Over a period of many months I learned to listen to what the pain was communicating to me and let go of many issues that I was holding inside me. As I let go and acknowledged what was happening, the pain slowly disappeared. I learned to listen to my body/mind system and understand that whatever it did was in my best interests.
- If you are in pain now sit silently and focus into the source of that pain. Allow it to communicate with you. What is it trying to get you to understand? If you have no pain, think back to when you had serious pain and go through the same process.
- When you understand what it is there for, accept and acknowledge the communication, and let the pain go.
- Fill the void left with a positive emotional state that can spread to fill your body and fulfill the communication you have received.
- Suspend any disbelief you have on this issue and feel what your body is saying to you. You will be amazed by the results.
Other Posts in the series 'Dealing With Chaos'
- 06. Do You Need, Desire Or Love
- 07. Show Me How To Control Others
- 08. Do You Find Intimacy Difficult
- 10. Look for the Learning in Emotional Pain
- 11. Are You Seeking The Truth?
- 12. Can You Look Forwards And Backwards?
- 13. Do You Blame Or Take Responsibility?
- 14. Are You Aware Of Your Masculinity?
- 15. Enjoy the Dusk, Celebrate the Day
- 16. Dealing With Chaos - Acceptance
- 17. Do You Accept Your Personalities?
- 18. What Do You Like About Yourself?
- 19. What Don’t You Like About Yourself?
- 20. What Would You Like To Change?
- 21. What Are You Willing To Do To Change?
- 22. Describe The Ideal You, The New You
- 23. How Will You Achieve Change?
- 24. Is Your Life A Construction Site Or A Garden?
- 25. How To Live With Uncertainty
- 26. Can You Let Go Of Your Ego?
- 27. Can You Now Accept Who You Are?
- 28. Enjoying The Person You Are
- 29. Celebrate Who You Are - Be Outrageous!
- 30. Dealing With Chaos - Authenticity
- 31. Do You Live Your Life At Full Potential?
- 32. What Vision Do You Have?
- 33. Do You Walk Your Talk?
- 34. What Are Your Spheres Of Influence?
- 35. How Do You Use Your Sexuality?
- 36. How Are You And Your Family?
- 37. How Do You Use Your Power And Strength?
- 38. Can Others Rely On You?
- 39. What Are You Dishonest About?
- 40. What Will You Stake Your Life On?
- 41. What Is Passion? What Drives You?
- 42. Do You Know Your Truth? Do You Speak It?
- 43. What Will Life Look Like Now?
- 44. Dealing With Chaos - Participants Open Their Hearts
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I have found that Yoga has enabled me to balance my personality and find my 'Still Point'. I use it to observe myself and deepen my masculinity with compassion, awareness and understanding. It has transformed me into a man who is both more alive and calmer.- November 2, 2016
Today I Felt the Shame of Being a Man
Graham experiences what it is like to be woman who is not listened to and suppressed. He looks at what men can do to fill this gender gap. Today I felt the pain of being a woman… Today I felt the shame of being a man…- October 26, 2016
Obesity in Men: What Is The Truth
Britain’s fattest man, Carl Thompson, was 33 years old and weighed 65 stone when he died in 2015. For those not from Britain, that is 410 kilos or 910 pounds. He was housebound, bed-ridden and alone. This was a man whose life had moved out of balance, and who ended up in a miserable, early death. This is an example of the issue of obesity in men.- October 16, 2016